Olivia James: Finding your Original Self

Nacht Waffen Pilot Guest Olivia James – 31 December 2022

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Olivia James’ father was involved in military intelligence and drug trafficking in the 1960s and 1970s.  After he became careless and was caught, he sold her into the MK- Ultra program in return for getting his charges dismissed.  At the age of six, James was taken to an East Coast psychiatric hospital for six months, where she and another boy were tortured; this was to create six front-alters and 100+ other alters, which would later be used for gathering intelligence on individuals (beta tracking) and for corporate espionage.

At thirteen, James was taken to the moon to learn personality profiling.  She also remembers a visit from an elderly Josef Mengele.  When James was in her early twenties, a company called Monarch solutions rented her to Illuminati families to serve as a medium.


(58:00) On consent:

When I was very young, probably five, I had an incident in my bedroom where I had these greys come. And it was just a basic hybridization program—they wanted eggs. And they literally asked me if they could have them, if I could help them, and I said, yes. And during a hypnosis session, I wanted to look at that, and I talked with these beings. And they say that the overall consent is because we have appointed people to speak for us in the government. So whatever they say goes, because we’ve appointed them; we’ve given our consent to them to speak for us, in a way. And I think it’s bullshit, but that’s what they say. So they’re saying we’ve consented already to many of the things that are going on in the world. And it’s total bullshit, but if you think about it— When they told me that, [I realized that] I probably have consented to some things that I wasn’t aware that I was doing.


On the successful reintegration of her alters

(1:00:00) The mind is so complex and the state of consciousness is so complex that this alter created its own world inside my mind. And when I visualized it, it’s a real place—she created a real world, a real dimension. This piece of me created this world, and it’s almost something a child would think of as a dark realm, because it happened when I was so young. Its a dark forest with a cemetary with a horned being, because it was a child’s mind that had created this world. And that’s where she is locked up. That’s because somehow they trained me to lock her in that area, so that she would only be released at a certain time. So, she’s under lock and key there, and back in that area.

But when you look inside the mind, and you’re trying to find your alters, the inside of your mind looks like the matrix. I saw lines, electric energy lines, everywhere inside my mind. The mind was so vast, it almost looked like a universe inside me—that’s how vast it was inside me, and it’s inside each person. You have no idea how vast you are on the inside; you have no idea.

So, when I saw that, and I figured out that what I’ve been afraid of my whole life is all these alters that are pieces of me—and it’s not something outside of me—it really helped me take control of trying to integrate them—especially some of the other alters that were made to do things that I didn’t want to manifest in my life anymore. Because it does make you do things that are not your real self; it wasn’t the real me doing those things. And it’s not even a way to make excuses for whatever I had done in my life; it was a reality that I had a different piece of my personality that was coming forth. And it is still me—I agree to that—but it’s a different piece of the personality that’s based in trauma that is triggered by something to come over. I mean, I’ve had times where I lost two months. Two months. I had memory loss from two whole months; I had no idea what I did for two months. It’s like you go into robotic mode, and you just keep walking and moving—

1:10:30 I share memory with mine now, because I can remember what they remember, and I can see what they see, and they can see what I see, which is the strangest thing, because it made me feel possessed. . . .

1:11:00 So I did want to talk about how I know when an alter is shifting. I have physical cues, and I know when it’s happening now. Before, I didn’t. Before, I’d have an alter split, and I’d have a completely different personality. I am not the same person I was in my twenties; I’m not the same person I was ten years ago, because it was an alter. I am not anything like who I used to be at all. And it’s very distressing that I lost a huge portion of my life to a different personality, because I don’t feel like that’s my life now, because it wasn’t the real me in charge and making decisions for myself. It was a part of me, but it was something that was trained out of trauma to make those decisions.

But when I start to feel an alter switching or an alter trying to come forth, I really do feel a physical sensation. It will start at the top of the head, and I start to feel numb towards the top, and then it will move towards my face, all the way down to my chin, and it usually settles right around the solar plexus area—and that’s where my internal portal is in the first place.

So, I can feel it coming on, and also, when I start to shift, it starts to change my speech. I will speak a little slower, or I will speak a little faster, or I’ll stop having—I just won’t be able to make out the right words. And then as soon as I switch out of alter, my normal speech happens. And I know when it’s happening, because I can feel it and I feel numb, and I just feel different. And it’s almost like I can’t look in my peripheral vision: everything is forward-facing, like when I have my vision.

And it’s very strange when it happens in places like your workplace and things like that, because you’ll be triggered off something that you [weren’t even aware of]. I might be listening to something, and a word triggered something so deep in my mind, because that’s how complex it is. I didn’t even know. And I wouldn’t even be actively listening. I’d be passively listening to something, and something floated into my mind.

So, if anybody wonders, that’s how strong your mind is; you just haven’t found that part yet that— Things like that can happen, where you can switch into a different personality. You didn’t even know you heard something—something can hit you that quickly. So, I have a physical trigger for it, like I can tell when it’s happening.

(1:15:20) When I started to figure out how to integrate the alters, I did it through hypnosis. And my whole life, I thought these alters were against me and trying to take me down and trying to hurt me, basically, because I felt like they hurt me because they let me do things that I didn’t want to do, or they made decisions that I didn’t want. I know in my heart of hearts that I didn’t want to hurt anybody else, emotionally or physically—whatever. That’s not who I am. I care about people; I try to help people. That’s not what I would want to do in any situation, either with relationships or whatever, any situation—that’s not what I wanted.

So, when I really had the chance to integrate them in hypnosis session, I thought they would fight me. At this point, when it really came down to it, these pieces of me rallied together and supported me. And [they] agreed— I mean, no matter how dark they were, they agreed. The very six front alters said it was time for them to go into retirement—that’s what they called it. They said I didn’t need them, and they would support me, and they themselves decided to go to sleep. And they said, “We will go to sleep; we don’t need to be awake.”

And when that happened, my entire personality changed. Everything about me changed. I felt different in every way. And it’s really a process of re-learning who you were supposed to be originally before all this happened. Because that’s how I feel. I didn’t know who I was supposed to be, so I have to re-learn my own original personality.

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